My Fitness

Thursday, June 30, 2016

goodbye and thanks for all the fish

Today was it. The end. No more. 

My foot has been killing me. Back around Valentines I broke my toe in two spots. The bruising and swelling was impressive and painful. I had been demonstrating a grande jete and came dangerously close to a barre. It made me land awkwardly. X-rays confirmed a break. Six weeks later I was still in pain but the follow-up X-ray showed a complete healing. I did the exact same step in June even while it still hurt and again landed awkwardly (probably because I was still injured) but while slightly painful nothing significant happened. BUT THEN this past weekend my husband picked up a dustpan and tried to kill a fly. He failed. Instead the dustpan swung wildly from his hand and the corner went right into my foot. I was in tears. Every day since then I was in tears. My foot hurt. My heel hurt. My shin hurt. I went to a doctor on Wednesday and she put me in an "air cast" which is basically a boot that I can take off while I drive and sleep. 

Walking up stairs is difficult. Chasing babies is difficult. Cleaning dishes is difficult. Tidying is difficult. 

And tending to hens is difficult. 

And so today was it. The end. No more. I asked some friends if they wanted our hens. Our run and coop were destroyed in a storm. The hens were roaming free and pooping everywhere. There are so many flies. Imagine giving birth to the Savior in such conditions. I digress. The boys were not gentle with them and I felt bad for the chickens. 

We sent Rita, Maryann, Kathy, Clare, Eileen, Betty, Rose, Mariko, and Ann home to live a better life on 2+ acres instead of our .14 acre. It was quite fun rounding them together in our destroyed backyard. On a broken foot. 

I think they'll be happy.

caleb's bridge

I am attending a bible study on Wednesday mornings this summer. The gal in charge asked me to present Scripture that goes along with the Bridge illustration similar to the video found at the bottom of THIS page. I'd never presented anything to anyone before then so I reviewed the video and practiced once. Caleb had awoken moments before I pressed play and was still half asleep when I watched the video. He asked me about each step as I did my practice.  I didn't think much of it until today.

Earlier today, Caleb was playing with a necklace of mine he found. He likes to use his feet and press objects into the air while he lies on his back. Today, it was my necklace. I've told him not to do this many times because he doesn't have control of the objects and he usually falls over and hits whoever is next to him. Today, he broke my necklace and the beads went everywhere. I wasn't upset because I've had the necklace for a long time and only wore it once. It isn't my style. But I thought this would be a "teachable moment". I explained that I had to help him clean up because he broke something of mine. He did something bad, and I have to pay the price. (He helped me clean up the beads) I told him how Jesus died on the cross because Caleb did bad things and Mommy did bad things, but it was Jesus who paid the price so we wouldn't have to pay it.

A short while later this morning, we read about Abram becoming Abraham and Sarai becoming Sarah. (Devotional #8 in THIS Bible) I always have the kids draw a picture of what we read after I'm finished reading. They rarely draw something relevant. Usually it's snails and bugs and happy faces. But today Caleb wrote "God" on the right side of his page and "Caleb" on the left side. He drew a chasm between them with flames down below (or are they spikes? He likes spikes.). Then he drew a bridge that looked very similar to a cross to bridge the gap between "Caleb" and "God".

You don't think your kids are paying attention, but they are. Be careful what you say to them and around them and be aware who else is around them. Fill your kids with Christ and his goodness. You never know what will stick. And remember that if you think you've screwed up and there's no coming back, God's grace covers you too. His mercies are new every day.

Zoe is trying to draw too!

Friday, June 24, 2016

unashamed review and giveaway

To win a copy of Unashamed by Heather Nelson simply comment below and I will pick a comment at random on Wednesday, June 29.

When I first was given Unashamed to read and review I was reluctant because I didn't think it would be relevant to me. I was guessing that unashamed was about some gal who was raped and needed to figure out how to deal with that. Since that is not part of my past, I was going to skip this review. I read it anyway and there was a lot of helpful information. While other's sins was part of the book, more relevant items (like struggling with being enough for my kids) were also present. Most helpful: defining what shame is and how it's different than guilt.

Take a look at the table of contents:
She goes through several types of shame and how to deal with each one. I don't think she's introducing any new ideas, but I haven't seen them compiled in one book before now. 

One idea I had when I read this first passage was, "What if I'm the one oppressing myself with thoughts of shame and guilt that the Lord never intended for me to bear? What did Christ bear on the cross if I take that back on myself?" Ok, am I going to feel guilty abut feeling guilty? *nervous chuckle* No, rather it was freeing to be able to Let It Go (there's parallels, just read the book then the song lyrics). 

 This is the most helpful page in the book. I was berating myself about being enough for my kids the other day. I was crying and Holly came to me and asked why I was crying. I told her that I was afraid that I was a bad mommy. And in her sweet two-year old voice she said, "oh you are not a bad mommy. You a good mommy!" And she hugged my head and gave me kisses. And then I went to my son before he fell asleep and said, "Micah, did you know that I love you? I think you're awesome. I think you're so special. I'm so glad that you are here and that you are my son. I love seeing all the things you do and achieve." And he looked up at me with his beautiful face and smiled and reached up to give me a hug. And then he fell asleep. That has nothing to do with this page, but it made me feel better. This page is helpful when I'm confused by my children's misbehavior. It's hard to know how to correct when you've not had it modeled.

This hit too close to home for me. My father once told me I would grow up to be a "leech on society" when my sisters and I asked what he'd think we'd each be when we grew up. My older sister was going to be a lawyer or doctor. My younger sister was going to be a teacher or ballerina. And I would be a leech on society. I mean, what does that even mean? Imagine trying to figure that out as a 9 year old. "Wait. Leeches suck the life out of people. So I'm going to be a useless, life sucking person?" Requests for clarification were denied. But I was definitely embarrassed even just in front of my sisters. Similarly, I was embarrassed when he pinched my side a couple years later "to see how fat I was" even though that was in front of no one. Or when my mother asked my ballet teacher about my fat back that same week, "oh surely I had noticed." No, I hadn't. But that I was fat was a burden I'd carry for the rest of my adolescence and a chunk of my adulthood. Luckily, I don't struggle with anorexia and bulimia any more or the shame that came from these memories. And luckily my husband is a godly man who always uplifts and encourages me. If you carry similar shame, it's not yours. You might enjoy this book.

This definition of perfectionism I thought was useful and might help some perfectionists desire to read about its link to shame. You don't have to be ashamed about being imperfect because our perfection is found in Christ, not in doing things perfectly.

There's discussion questions at the end of each short chapter. Let me know if you'd like a copy!

"Disclosure (in accordance with the FTC’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising”): Many thanks to Propeller Consulting, LLC for providing this prize for the giveaway. Choice of winners and opinions are 100% my own and NOT influenced by monetary compensation. I did receive a sample of the product in exchange for this review and post. Only one entrant per mailing address, per giveaway.  If you have won a prize from our sponsor Propeller / FlyBy Promotions in the last 30 days, you are not eligible to win.  Or if you have won the same prize on another blog, you are not eligible to win it again. Winner is subject to eligibility verification.”
#un-ashamed #FlyBy

Tuesday, June 14, 2016

quilt devotional

About the Book:
quilt is love that serves a purpose.
The devotions in My Mother’s Quilts are inspired by family heirloom quilts, some more than 100 years old. With humor and sincerity, Ramona Richards shares her memories and lessons learned from the quilters whose legacies live on in their work. Rich, personal, sometimes heartbreaking, often funny, each reading provides a lesson and encouragement from the faithful women who crafted the quilts. Together, these devotions depict the enduring legacy of faith, family, and beloved traditions. Includes full color photographs of each of the 30 quilts!

I've been given this cute little devotional to review. While it's lacking in any doctrine or in-depth biblical devotional meat, it has fun stories about quilts with prayers and Bible verses. I do not think this would make for a good daily devotional, but it would make a very nice coffee table addition or perhaps a bathroom break addition. You might even put it in your guest bedroom atop a quilt in hopes that your guest will read a few pages and feel more at home. It's an interesting and comforting book. It has very beautiful pictures.

Head over to My Mother's Quilt website for a giveaway! You could win one of the actual quilts in the book - which is awesome.

Thursday, June 2, 2016

my calendar said no events

My calendar said I had no events for the day. I even Instagrammed a screenshot of my "no events" day and joked about not getting dressed today.

But I feel like I've been going non-stop with this uneventful day.

First someone peed all over me. These people have beds of their own. Why don't they use them? I even bribe them with candy if they would simply sleep in their own beds. But then I suppose they wouldn't be able to wake me at 4am covered in urine. Ah, motherhood.

So I showered. nbd.

(I still need to change the sheets.)

I went back to sleep. I slept late. Last night I ate a lot of junk food and whenever I do that I can't handle the next day; it's like a carb-hangover. My head hurts, I'm irritable, and I'm lethargic.

I try to teach my kids some math. My four year old insists he can't count to 20. He doesn't know what comes next. He says he doesn't know the rules. If he were counting how many M&Ms he could eat, he'd be able to count to 20.

My six year old won't stop sitting on the table. And he won't stop touching everything. I mean everything: even food. My food. My drink. Not just my cup, mind you; he has to stick his finger in my liquid. WHY?!?! It's like a compulsion. Similar to his compulsion to get bird poop on himself on a regular basis. Just stay out of the coop and you'll be a lot less likely to get feces on you. He gets multiple baths and showers a day. He's changed his clothes 2-3x today, I lost track.

My two year old is some kind of Xena Warrior Princess. Last night she insisted on watching Pride & Prejudice & Zombies with me. She got so excited when the fighting began and jumped and kicked and slashed her way through the zombies. She woke up screaming last night and when I asked her what her nightmare was about she said it was her clothes. She didn't want to wear clothes and thought that she was. Nothing about zombies. When I tried to get her to count to 4 she kept skipping 3. When I had her count M&Ms, magically all four numerals were accounted for. M&Ms are magic, you guys.

Meanwhile, my 8 month old...wait, is it eight? (Sept, Oct, Nov, Dec, Jan, Feb, Mar, Apr, May, Jun) Yep, 8.5 even. Wow. So she's 8 months old and is trying to walk everywhere. She's very cute. She always smells amazing. She always wants to eat. And sleep. And play. And be all up in your business when you just want to drink your water in peace. And she wants to eat bugs. And dead things. And suck on cords. And chew dirt. How is she still alive?!

So speaking of dead things...our hermit crab went missing. He was a jerk. He killed his mate to get his shell. I usually checked on him when I fed Raymond, our betta fish who lives a foot away from him. Earlier this week Micah, my 4 year old who only counts M&Ms to 20, informed me that he couldn't find the crab and that he thinks he climbed the fake tree and escaped. So we cleaned the already very clean room trying to find the poor little murderer. I looked behind the chest of drawers and saw his tiny orange shell wedged against the wall. But alas, the shell was empty. Gasp! Where could he be? I think this is what happened:
My name is Ishbosheth. These giant apes who kidnapped me only refer to me as "the hermit crab" and stuck me in this tiny cell with Bartholomew the Saint who selfishly wouldn't give me his shell when I wanted it. He eventually let me have it after I killed him. I tried to escape after that while I was still in the Apes's kitchen, but I fell in the sink and couldn't make it down the drain under the garbage disposal before they "rescued" me. I hung out by the bonsai for awhile before they bought Raymond. Raymond is an easy going, care-free mooching betta fish who swims around arrogantly showing off his absolutely amazing red fins. I can't lie. He's beautiful. I hate him. He lives a foot away from me on the wall now in Little Ape's bedroom. He gets to swim and he gets a name. I get to be alone because I killed my mate. I know we're suppose to be social. I miss Bartholomew. Why didn't he just give me his shell? This is all his fault. I'm going to break out of here. This place is stupid. I know that if I can break free from my prison, and escape back to the mall, everything will be fine. The mall is on the other side of the car door. Just shut the door and open it again and I'm back. Step 1: climb the tree in the dark and crawl toward the door. [I heard this part in retrospect but thought it was my bearded dragon walking around his cage. It was not.] Step 2: shoot. I fell down this tight cliff. And I'm stuck. I hate this shell anyway. It reminds me of stupid Saint Bartholomew. Forget it. I'll dump the shell. I'll go against all internal instincts and go shell-less. I killed a fellow crab when I'm supposed to be social and I'm going shell-less when I'm supposed to always have a shell. I may be crazy. [He's insane.] Step 3: run around trying to find the mall. I can't see anything in the dark. Step 4: wander over 30 feet without a shell and yep, I just died. 
So he looks just like a toy curled up in the far corner of the adjacent room. I wonder what he was thinking about as he died. Probably, "I shouldn't have been so evil to Bartholomew. Maybe now his face will stop haunting me. Maybe now I can finally be at peace at the giant mall in the sky."

Zoe found him. She put him down as soon as I told her to put him down. Good baby. So gross though.

Then we played with my new tortoises. I found a couple of tortoises for sale and I really wanted them. I talked the guy down to $100 but Felipe was still anti-more pets. So I up and sold Eddie. Eddie was not too much fun. I got the feeling he wasn't happy with me. I wasn't happy with him. For being a DRAGON he was pretty lame: no fire breathing and no flying. I was disappoint. I even made him a motivational poster but it didn't seem to help. Eddie Lizard went to live with someone who has a lot more reptiles and lizards and I think they will be much more happy with him and he with them. And the $100 I got for him I turned around and gave to Richard.


And that is how The Doctor and Rose came to live with us.

When I told Felipe their new names, all he said was, "Of course." They have a TARDIS log. It looks like they walk under it but really they're going on adventures and saving aliens and planets. Maybe The Doctor and Rose will have babies. They seem happy. My kids drew tortoise pictures for the couple. That made me happy. Micah's tortoise was a rainbow tortoise. Caleb's tortoise was playing the trumpet.

And then...

Caleb came inside the house from the garage and tells me that the chicks have escaped. "The chickens?!" "Nooooo! The chicks!" So I go out to the garage and sure enough there are only 4 of 9 chicks in the pen still. The ceiling wire has fallen and the babies are looking around curiously. I don't know how much or if at all Caleb helped the chicks escape. He denies being responsible and I'm sure if he had any hand in it, it was an accident. We quickly fixed the coop out back and got the chicks outside. I figure this was their creative, inter-species way of telling us they were getting too big for the pen. We chased the chicks around the garage quite a bit and the garage is so messy now! Ha! We must have been quite the sight. I wish we had a camera!

update: the baby chicks are alive and well weeks later in the backyard.

Also we sent our ducks on their way. With all the birds in the backyard the pecking order was getting a bit much. My friend has an amazing pond in her backyard and the ducks seem much happier there. Our decision was blessed with a full rainbow when we returned.