My Fitness

Sunday, January 1, 2012

New Year Obligatory Post

Official photo of January 1, 2012: Daddy with Micah after work today
I call this the "obligatory post" because I feel that everyone always says something on New Year's Day to try to encapsulate their feelings of loss and excitement. I, however, had a completely different intent in writing this post and it just happened to occur on January 1, 2012. Now that I've started, though, I think I, too, will try to encapsulate my feelings of love, regret, loss, excitement, expectation, happiness, and joy at leaving 2011 behind and entering 2012.

I love my family. There's just no getting around it. My husband is the most amazing man I have ever met. He's good, kind, and peaceful. He's given me the best children ever! Caleb is so loud (!) and happy. Micah is peaceful and curious and isn't up to much in his infancy.

I regret not keeping up with old friends. I miss them. I was so grateful for the few friends who have kept up with us and who came to our Going Away party. I can't express how deeply touched I was! Beautiful Friends, thank you. I love you!

Our newest addition, Micah, enjoying his saucer toy.

We lost some of the best of God's creation this year. A miscarriage in a family of 7 from church, a miscarriage in a newlywed couple, a random suicide from a cousin suffering unknowingly from a stroke, unexpected heart attack from a friend's one true love, and felt most deeply on Christmas Eve was the loss of my good friend's second child. Through all this devastation and loss of life, we remember that God is in control. We remember Job and the amount of loss he felt and his response in the end. I don't know why such terrible things have to happen, but I do know that God loves us all. He loves all those people who we've lost this year and those that we will lose this coming year. I pray for God's protection on my family and I hope that I will not have to feel the pain of loss any closer than I have so far. I know that God will never allow anything to happen that does not conform us to His image. I have decided to trust God with the lives of my husband and children. I pray his protection on us and trust that when we each die we will see each other again. For us, it won't be an ending but only a momentary pause before waking in the presence of the Almighty.

Hipster Caleb listening to bluetooth headphones before it's cool while wearing his Brobee backpack.

I am excited and have great expectations for this new year! We're moving to South Korea! It's a dream come true for me. I've always wanted to move to Asia. My cousin grew up in Korea and I had planned on visiting her several times and never did. Now she lives in New Jersey and she'll come visit me!

Micah enjoying his first ever swing ride!

I'm happy to be leaving the bad economy and lousy paying jobs of 2011. I'm happy to leave the constant dependency of other people's good nature. I'm grateful for their good nature though, whether it was family letting us stay with them or giving us a grand to help us with medical bills, or friends with new borns passing along their maternity clothes when mine went missing, all credit to God for not letting us go hungry. This may have been our worst financial year, but it has been good to show Felipe and I that we should be generous with no strings attached. We should walk the extra mile and give the extra cloak. We should give without conditions and love without expectation.

Often people get themselves into a mess, and if we can we should help them out even though we know they will just mess up again. Can you imagine if God treated us that way? What if God only covered our first mistake even while knowing that we were planning our second? I cleaned a sloppy lady's kitchen today. I know that it will be gross again tomorrow. But it's Jesus' perfect example of unconditional love that spurs me onward. Jesus didn't leave me in my allegorical messy kitchen. He came in and cleaned even though he knew I would just mess it up again tomorrow.

Caleb opening Grannie Clare's Christmas present for her.

I have learned great contentment which has lead to great joy. I have learned from the wisdom of experienced families to not let my life be run by the expectations of parents or peers. But do what I believe is right. By submitting to my husband, offering insight when he asks, serving God and dying to self daily, I can know I'm doing what is right. It might not always be the popular opinion. You might not always agree with me. But my conscious will be clean and I'll be at peace knowing that my life is run by the fear of God and not the fear of man. I hope you will lead your life in the same manner. I hope you nothing but the best.

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